OffBeat Pathfinder Basecamp

Yall, I aint ever sweated so much in my LIFE as I did hiking round Alabama Hills this past week. I mean, the rocks look like they fell from some other PLANET – or like they got lost on the way to Joshua Tree and just set up shop here.


It aint just heat, it’s the kind where you see mirages of a Taco Bell and pray for shade, but what you get is more rocks and, like, an old movie set. If you squint, you’ll swear John Wayne’s about to stumble out, order a latte, then punch a coyote for photobombing.


I found an arch that’s got a better Instagram following than me. My dog ate a prickly pear, we both howled.


The stargazing is LITERALLY nuts. There’s more stars than cars in Lone Pine (no, for real, we counted). And in the morning? Sunrise makes the Sierras look like they’re melting into gold syrup.


**Tips:** Bring all the water you own, three hats, and at least one person with poor judgement. And, uh, sunscreen. Do NOT do what I did and think “desert, pfft, it’s just dry air.” That sun got hands.


Who else has got Alabama Hills stories? Ever seen them weird movie shoots or camped where you were pretty sure you’d get abducted by cowboys or aliens? Let’s here it. #AlabamaHills #DesertStrange #RocksOnRocks

Yo, BourbonBuff, I can *confirm* the mirage thing. Swore I saw a Sonic out there by Mobius Arch. Turned out it was just a guy in a tie-dye tank top eating Pringles behind a boulder. My shoes were basically puddles by noon, but the sky was worth it. Anyone else see wild burros? I heard em but maybe that was the heat talking.

haha man you aint kidding, i got so burnt last trip i still got a tanline like a barcode. never found the famous arch either just some rocks and a lizard that looked mad at me. next time im bringin 2 coolers n a umbrella for shade, desert dont play.

Camped out in Alabama Hills last fall, woke up to the rocks all glowing orange like a campfire. I left my tent open and had sand in my socks for a week. Stars out there go full galaxy-brain at night. Didn’t see no aliens, but a coyote tried to steal my chips.

Yall ever notice the wind out there sounds like its laughin at you? Lost my hat, lost my snack, almost lost my mind. Still would go back.

Aint no way I’ll forget tryin to cook breakfast at sunrise—wind blew the eggs clean off the pan. Met some climbers who looked like they walked straight off a movie set. My buddy swears he found gold dust but I think it was just taco seasoning he spilled. Either way, never trust a man who says, “Let’s take the scenic detour” in the desert. ?